Pushing past my comfort zone

The past three weeks, I’ve been working like crazy on Marie Forleo’s B-School program, trying like hell to figure out what in the world I’m supposed to be doing with my life — at least, my professional life. The rest of my life is up for grabs, too. (I’ll write about that in a post soon.) For the moment, I’m focusing on my professional self.

So basically, if I’m not at work or running an errand (or maybe — maybe — at the gym), I’m glued to my Mac and going through a series of really intense exercises that have to do with starting and nurturing my own business.

Did I say intense? I meant to say I N T E N S E.

This course is pushing me past my comfort zone, in a good way. Luckily, the comments by other people in B-School show me I’m not alone in that. I see people saying they’re alternately feeling inspired and overwhelmed: recognizing that where they are right now isn’t where they want to be and seeing, in fact, that they can forge a path to get there.

I made a huge discovery two weeks into the program: I don’t want to start a business as a professional copywriter. Nope. Will do it for my 9-to-5 while I’m building my own business, but not outside of that.

I do want to keep writing fiction and nonfiction books as an author. I’ll never stop doing that; I love it too much.

What I really want to do for my own business is help “solopreneurs” set up their WordPress websites. I have quite a bit of skill in this area and am realizing more and more that people need a “non-techie” person to walk them through it. They want someone who speaks their language to help them. I love this business idea because it uses all of my skills, including setting up and running online courses (love that), writing (also love that), teaching (so much fun for me) and working with graphic design elements (I lose hours to photography and playing in Photoshop).

During this past week, I’ve done a lot to get this business started and plan to open the doors in mid-May. I still have a lot to do, but it doesn’t feel like work to me. I get to create tutorial videos and lessons, and then I get to engage in marketing the business to people who really need help.

What’s not to like about that?

I have to admit something, though. With every step forward that I take, I still feel a twang of bittersweet grief, wishing that I were 20 years younger with more time to be who I really am, now that I know I can really live my life and not just exist within it.

OK, enough of that. It’s back to B-School. I think I need a cup of hot chocolate first …


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